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Roughly ten years ago, my mom told my sister and me that my grandfather was diagnosed with Alzheimers at the mere age of 66. I remember the day like it was yesterday: my mom had a long call with my grandmother and when she got off the phone to tell us, her eyes were filled with tears and it took her a while to share all the news with us. I was an early teenager at this point and I had no idea what Alzheimers was or the affect that it would have on my family: the one thing I did know was that by the reaction my mom had, it was going to be a painful process. 

The first year or so, I didn't really notice a difference in my grandfather. He was still my Papa, and he continued to show unwavering support and love for me. However, there were some drastic changes in my grandparents life that I couldn't fully comprehend in the moment but were tell-tale signs as to the impact this disease was eventually going to have. Suddenly, they downsized their home and Papa stopped going to things on his own. And then, in what feels like the flip of a switch, everything changed. Papa's condition deteriorated insanely fast and I never heard him say my name again. Holidays and time spent with my grandparents were confined to their town in Ohio, which was the only place Papa had ever lived and would hopefully recognize despite having traveled the entire world only a few years before. Interactions with Papa soon had to be tactical: speak only of things that were comfortable to him, let him be quiet if he needed to be, and never be get frustrated if there was no response or he seemed confused. For his whole life, Papa was the nicest, most caring, and kind man that ever lived. I had never experienced him angry or yell at other people until he started to in his final years. He started to become aggressive with my mom (his daughter) and even me and my sister, who he revered pre-Alzheimers as his pride and joy. The disease had completely changed his demeanor and wiped away the man he had been for 60 years.

My Papa passed away from Alzheimer's on November 14th, 2020 after having been in a memory care center for a couple of months. I was fortunate enough to have been with him for his final days. I still remember saying my personal goodbye to him, where it was just me and him in his room together. His physical health had diminished in the days beforehand and much of the time he spent asleep. I thanked him for the life he gave me and for all the love and support growing up and when I said I loved him, he made the first sound he had in days. He knew I was there despite barely holding on. 

Papa fought with Alzheimers seven years. While he was directly victim to the disease, Alzheimer's took a toll on everyone in my family, but no one more so than my Grammy. Practically overnight, the man she had been married to for over 50 years was diagnosed with an incurable disease and she turned into a healthcare worker in addition to her roles as a wife, mother, and active community member. Her life as she knew changed. She took incredible care of Papa for nearly his entire journey, before it became too much and she had to relinquish control to the memory care center. My Grammy is the strongest women I know and I never want the impact this disease had on her to happen to anyone else.