My Story…
My Daughter Sabrina's Story, as she documented it in her journal.....
Who would I be if I had greater mastery over my mind?
Pretty kick ass, I think! This is a loaded question though. I look at the formative moments of the last half of my life and can see how each one set me on a different path from the one I had envisioned for myself. I was walking towards the beach, but somehow ended up falling down a crevasse on a mountain. I was lost and confused. Angry and upset. Sad. Disappointed. And when I had just about given up and resigned myself to the fact that that I would be stuck alone in the deep, dark depths of that crevasse, I saw a light. A tiny, spark of light, barely nothing. And I found within me a strength I didn’t know I had – climbing and climbing until I reached the top and pulled out of the crevasse’s grip, exhausted beyond belief.
So, who would I be if I had greater mastery over my mind? I think I’d be pretty freaking awesome. But here’s the thing. I am pretty awesome as it is, or I like to think I am. I look back at what I’ve been through and how I’ve grown, and I’m pretty damn proud of myself. Not in an egotistical way, but in a victorious way. I fell way, way down, but slowly got back up and kept climbing.
That’s the funny thing about climbing mountains though. Just when you think, you’ve reached the top you see another peak in front of you. You could stop, because “here” is just as good. But “here” is better than the last pit stop, and the one before that. You could stop, but why would you? The beauty in the changes between “summits” is awesome, but chasing the view is no better than falling down a crevasse. Plus, it’s tiring as heck. I think for now I’ll rest on this plateau, not plateaued, but rest in admiration of what’s around me. Maybe tomorrow I can try to climb.
Sabrina Kaur Dhanjal
March 19, 1990 – February 26, 2023
Forever in our hearts
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